What Type of Outdoorsman Are You?
Check out these four types of outdoorsmen, and see which one you are!
Complete with thick glasses, a warm flannel shirt, and a vintage camera of some sort, the hipster is keen on uncharted wilderness. That is, at least far enough from the interstate to snap some rad photos in an Eno for Instagram before losing more than a bar or two of cell service. This “unique” outdoorsman dons multiple layers of clothes topped by a thick flannel shirt to ensure getting too cold is NOT an option, despite the frigid temperatures of southern Alabama. Usually the flannel is accompanied by designer boots, which, surprisingly, have good foot support. If found in a predicament, the hipster can still hike his way to the closest coffee shop to order French press coffee and reminisce on grand adventures.
Sometimes you stumble upon these outdoorsmen on Instagram in awe of their laid-back free spirit. Long hair (often dreads), bare feet, and organic food are scattered throughout photos of sunrises and land devoid of human life. Often accompanied by their children sporting seashell necklaces, windblown hair, and suntanned skin, we find ourselves longing for the simple, carefree life of these outdoorsmen. But, we also wonder, when is the last time they showered?
Knowledgeable on the outdoors and equipped with the ability to live out of a backpack, this outdoorsman is prepared for almost anything. Traveling mountains for weeks at a time, unreachable by modern technology, and surviving on a diet of dehydrated and canned delicacies, these individuals have no need for the comforts of life. Due to the lack of showers, razors, and soap, the finished product is a hairy, dirt-smeared, sunburned individual who requires at least three to five business days before being accepted back at work.
As the original outdoorsman, the Sasquatch, or Bigfoot as he is affectionately known, is offended by the “fakes” he sees wandering his home. In an attempt to hide from imposters, he makes himself impossible to find and leads the human race to wonder about his existence. He hopes by forcing others to find him, they learn how to become proper outdoors types. So far, however, the noisy men who strap themselves and cameras to trees to capture his photo are his only pursuers. Oh well, at least he has his friend Nessie.
Be well, Auburn.